And now, What?`

Everything is right. It is my particular way of seeing things that makes you wrong.

The truth is all encompassing, thus, limitless, thus, unknowable to the human mind.  It must be knowable to someone, otherwise, what’s the point? It is my fear of the unknown that urges me wanting/needing to know, which prevents me from seeing the truth…. The all there is, is here, permanently.

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Per definition, enlightenment is something, a situation, a moment when we suddenly know something we didn’t know before. There is so much more that we don’t know than what we know, so, how can we recognise it, let alone, understand it?

What can we do to find enlightenment? Meditate, be vegetarian, go to seminars or follow a guru? Even this may help, still, after one found it, how could, would one know that one found it? What does enlightenment look like?

Enlightenment finds us, individually! Unexpectedly, it is a moment, a flash, then I know everything, for a moment, then it’s gone. Overwhelmed, I may remember one thing. Luckily, it remembers me.

… chopping wood, carrying water.

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The fool knows nothing and therefore has the potential to see truth. The state of Wu Wei, 無為 , when without expectation, allows seeing. Does he see it? Yes. Does he know it? No! He would need to know it in order to be able to see what it is, but then he could not see it. Dichotomy.

He sees it, and there is no point, no purpose, no use. Seeing the truth is useless. It does nothing, it is. I have forgotten… did I ever see it? I remember a bright moment… since then, I often choose different options to what I used to do. I recognise more often the point of choice. My behaviour altered, and often … I do nothing… and all is done.

I express, I clad in words; my physical being learns this way.

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Emotions are real to me, I can tell you, but not true.

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If we all could connect for a moment and see and bring everything we see into one knowing, when all is one, truth is seen.

I imagine. Where is the sameness of all? In surrender of individuality… the I am. As long as I name myself, can be named, I am. Witches have no names. In moments of surrender of borders, my skin, my consciousness, awareness, needs, emotions, expectations, hopes, dreams, knowing or anything other… in these times, the I am dissolves.

In we are is separation, demarcation, borders. What moves us closer? Sameness. Physically, we are very much the same. Our mind aims for difference because it is easier to recognise, not similarity, even we are. Open communication helps to find out, but when does this happen?

What prevents me from dissolving? Fear… of the unknown, and fiercely I cling onto the illusive snippets of believing that I know.

Rubbish. All these bits consist of is useless, pompous wishful illusion, and my fear gives it value, makes it a possession, a possession of rubbish. The fear of my mind who hangs onto this, his creation of what life is… and you and you and all there is.

My sweet little darling, come here to me, I hold you safe…

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I don’t know the truth, it is unknowable and I let this be. And I know that this reality is not… it is an illusion.

And now what? Sometimes, moments of peace and calm. In there, something grows… contentment, in which I dissolve.

Thank you, for reading… for giving me space to express, for my little mind to focus, stop chatter for some moments.

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For enduring enlightenment, there needs to exist consistency.  There are enlightened moments. They have hit me unexpectedly. Glaring, blasting, all-engorging and before I knew, they were gone.

They are so overwhelming, I had no time for recognising what they were or meant. I could not find a message, some glorious wisdom being transmitted. The only thing I learned is that they are, that they happen… and then they are gone.

What remains is this magnificent awe, a feeling of absoluteness. Is this truth?

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Or, perhaps, the cause of the bright light is a neuronic short-circuit of a cluster of brain cells, and the sense of vastness is due to the empty space, left behind by evaporated brain matter.

Lately, my way of thinking has simplified… maybe, because of the reduction of mental capacity.

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Someone said: “You shall know the Truth by its character.”  Tell me what this means?

Ω

Amadeus W.
Ingeneer

15 October 2016

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